Have you ever read the back cover of a book and thought, “Who the hell greenlit this?” And I don’t mean that it’s poorly written. I mean that it’s a premise so outlandish, so bizarre, that you’re surprised an editor didn’t pull them aside and say, “Hey, maybe we should workshop this a bit more?” I find this level of free will inspiring.
Philosophers have debated free will for centuries, and there are essentially three schools of thought: determinism (everything is predetermined), libertarianism (we have total free will), and compatibilism (somehow both?). Based on these authors below, I have to say I’m starting to lean toward libertarianism (philosophically, not politically…). These books are proof that free will exists and that some people are using theirs to create the most unhinged narratives imaginable — and I fully support their right to be weird as fuck!
Some books play it safe. These books say fuck that. No premise is too weird, too specific or too unhinged. So the next time someone tells you that there are no original stories left, just hand them one of these.
Walking Practice by Dolki Min
A horny, shapeshifting alien crashes their spaceship into Earth and has to learn how to be human to survive. Unfortunately, they also have to eat to survive and it just so happens that humans taste pretty damn good.
“What does it mean to be a woman? Among other things, it means that you have to decorate yourself and act like a woman. No one has ordered me to do so; I willingly take on the responsibility. For if the performance is not carried out properly, I am nothing more than a monstrosity. It is imperative that I am not seen as a monster. My work and my life depend on it.”
Everything you learned in your high school English class? Go ahead and toss that out of the window! This book takes traditional syntax and says, I don’t know her. I’ve never read a book like this before. (Take a shot every time I say this! Blackout Edition.)
Vibe check: 👽🔪🫦
Read this if: You want body horror meets cultural commentary.
Dengue Boy by Michel Nieva
The year is 2272 and capitalism has destroyed the planet so badly that one of the only livable climates is Antarctica, which of course, has become a tropical holiday destination. Our protagonist is a little boy who has the deadly dengue virus and is getting bullied at school because of it.
“Life or cash? But what is life without cash, or, even worse, cash without life?”
You had me at “mutant mosquito boy goes to school.” ❤️ This is some extreme satire on capitalism that is built on pandemic destruction, something that is hitting a little too close to home these days. This story never goes where you think it’s going to. There are many parts I loved, but dare I say… this may have been too weird for me?
Vibe check: 🦟🏝️😵💫
Read this if: You want an absurd, anti-capitalist, revenge sci-fi.
Geek Love by Katherine Dunn
A traveling carnival family deliberately breeds their children to be freaks — using drugs, radiation, whatever it takes — so they can be the main attractions. Our narrator is an albino hunchback dwarf, and if you can believe it, she is the least interesting sibling. This book certainly isn’t for everyone, but no jury in the world could convict this book of not being one of a kind!
“They thought to use and shame me but I win out by nature, because a true freak cannot be made. A true freak must be born.”
Vibe check: 🎪😬🤡
Read this if: You want family drama that makes your own look relatively normal. Or you really loved AHS Freak Show.
Monstrilio by Gerardo Samano Cordova
A grieving mother keeps a piece of her dead son’s lung in a box. She feeds it and it turns into a little bat boy that she raises. Any questions? Don’t be fooled by this off-the-wall premise, though. This book is deeply moving and a really beautiful exploration of grief.
“Wouldn’t that have been a groundbreaking discovery, someone bringing a creature to life solely with their own grief and a prodigious unwillingness to let go?”
Vibe check: 🦇🫁💔
Read this if: You like your grief narratives with a touch of queer body horror.
Hard Copy by Fien Veldman
A woman falls in love with her printer. Personally, I have beef with my printer, so this could never be me. This book takes an office object — functional, dull, meant only to reproduce — and turns it into an object of desire. Hey, everyone has their coping mechanisms for the toll of capitalism.
“Every office worker is just a little puppet, and when the puppet breaks or gets mangled in the machinery gears, well, that’s no problem at all for the office system. The office is really just a machine like me, its staff easily replaceable components. People tend to overestimate their own value and importance, but I understand that this is crucial for the employee’s psychological motivation. Only if they feel this way will they show up for work, day in, day out.”
Listen, when you are committed to reading weird books, eventually you’re going to stumble into ‘girl falls in love with printer’ territory. I don’t make the rules. I first listened to this as an audiobook and I highly recommend it. When we get a POV switch in the last few chapters, this book really had me looking at my appliances a little differently. 👀
Vibe check: 🗄️🖨️🫦
Read this if: You’ve ever had a weird work crush.
Lobster by Guillaume Lecasble
A lobster survives being cooked while on board the Titanic and gives a human woman her first orgasm. What else do you need to know?
“Go back to being a lobster?! After all he had been through, even if Jules were to put him back in the water the very thought of rocks, seaweed, and the markings of the depths filled him with horror. He had tasted the light of human living and he could no longer do without it.”
I don’t know how to explain why, but this is something only a French person could write. I’m obsessed with the idea of someone reading this novella and thinking, “More people need to read this. I simply must translate!” I’m glad they did.
Vibe Check: 🦞🚢💦
Read this if: You ever wondered what happened to all of the uneaten crustations that were on the Titanic.
I Will Rot Without You by Danger Slater
I really had to push past my katsaridaphobia with this one! I’m not even really sure how to explain this one. Basically, Ernie has just gone through a breakup and his life is a mess. Literally. His apartment is being overrun by sentient mold and cockroaches. But then he meets his neighbor Dee. It’s a love story, but don’t go running to the romance section of your local bookstore. This book explores the dark intensity that love can take — loss, anger, possessiveness.
“Cockroaches fill up my life like raindrops in a reservoir.”
It’s hard to truly recommend this book, but if you can push past all of the grossness — and there’s a lot of it — this is actually a rather beautiful story. Sometimes love is gross.
Vibe Check: 😷🪳🤎
Read this if: You’re really good at compartmentalizing your phobias and don’t mind some truly bizarro fiction.
Got any other recommendations? Let me know!
Thanks for reading, dolls! And if you find any typos, they were a creative choice. 💋